posted by MattRock on Mar 31
I want to take a second to show you all how awesome my mom is.
Who expects to see this in their Easter basket?
Yes, I received the packaged while backpacking through the jungle.
No big deal.
But on a serious note, I have to apologize for some of my recent behavior problems.
You see, while working on the new album, Timbaland and I decided we needed a little help. So we figured why not call in Fiddy Cent. The young gentleman should be able to bring some ill flavor to our mix. and boy were we right
Little did I know how much 50 loves to party.
The night got out of hand.
Fast.
And the popo had to get involved
I guess that’s the price you pay
posted by MattRock on Mar 30
The Endeavour space shuttle recently touched back down to earth after another successful mission.
Space rocks. I cant wait to be an astronaut, I’m actually in training
posted by MattRock on Mar 28
its guna be mad fun.
Here is where we sit
posted by MattRock on Mar 26
Yes an amazing 21 years ago this world decided it needed a bit more awesomeness, and here I stand.
For the most part the beginning of snowboard the trip was great. We didn’t even hit traffic.
Although we had other nuisances we had to deal with.
Anyway after battling ultra Hamburglar we were ultra hungry and had to get 20 piece chicken nuggets.
Didn’t even know that still existed but it does.
So anyway, then we go snowboarding. It happens to be ultra awesome.
Everyone was on the slopes, I even saw a few celebrities
then we got into a fight with like 20 bad guys and they all had guns.
Chris came out looking like a total bad ass.
You should see them.
Then we saw the magical underwear tree.
Weirdest shit Ive ever seen
How does it get there is what I want to know
By the end of the trip I realized I had a sun burn
go figure
Pizzle
posted by MattRock on Mar 21
Greetings.
I blog to you tonight, another year wiser and more badass.
A lot of people have come up to me today and said, “Hey Matt, Your such an ultra badass, what kind of birthday cake is badass enough for your birthday?”
Ever hear the Fraze, A picture is worth athousand words?
Ya.
That’s the kind of cake that’s badass enough for me
The cake was delicious and great until an unwanted guest showed up.
Asshole.
Anyways, cheers to me.
posted by MattRock on Mar 20
I see you’ve noticed my completely badass battle helmet.
Thanks.
I needed it’s protection while fighting dragons .
Now some of you might be saying to yourselves,
I dunno Matt, I thought dragons were extinct… and hunting them doesnt sound like a good idea anyway.
Well.
Your wrong.
Read a science text book dummy, or better yet watch Discovery Channel HD.
And Hunting them is a great idea. Cause I said so.
ANYWAY
here are some things you will need while on a quest to destroy all dragons
Sword
Shield
Battle Helmet
Milk
Double Stuf Oreos
Basically the plan goes like this.
Invite the dragon to have some delicious snack cakes with you.
while eating ,offer the dragon milk to go along.
Bam.
Bet you didn’t know dragons were lactose intolerant.
I did.
So now with the dragons fire breath sub-duded by the milk, sleigh him.
The end.
See you tomo. same time same place
posted by MattRock on Mar 18
Join Matt on his magical subway adventure. Then meet the Kung Fu Girls and hear what they have to say about crashing RV’s into houses, adventures with Tom Higgenson from the Plain White Tee’s, motion in the ocean, crab walking and a great dance party.
posted by MattRock on Mar 17
I want to apologize to the millions of you that read this blog. I know its been a long 2 days since my last post.
But unfourtunatly the blogging machine broken.
But we fixed it.
OH HEY!
This weekend I saw an awesome movie by the name of Doomsday .
To be honest.
Loved the movie.
There’s a wicked nasty super virus, a 16 car crashes and 90 billion explosions.
It had an awesome plot line and all that stuff too; for people not easily excited by loud noises and bright lights as me.
The film is directed by friend of America’s Bad Kids, Neil Marshall , and everyone should check out his shit.
My friends and I were even more floored when actors from the movie Bob Hoskins and Malcolm McDowell showed up.
go see it.
Ps.
Dont be creul to animals like Lauren.
posted by MattRock on Mar 16
snakes .
Plain and simple.
You can’t trust them,
They don’t have arms,
And they cheat on their taxes.
I’ll go further to say that no snake has ever helped mankind.
Now you can go ahead and blabber about how they eat mice and what not. but that’s what cats are for.
but then again cats suck too.
hey I like dragons
posted by MattRock on Mar 16
I’ve always loved a dancing fruit. Especially this one.
